The Power of Women’s Nurturing, Gentle and Forgiving Qualities in Politics
At the December 20th Democratic debate, the candidates were asked the question, “Either name a gift each would give to a rival onstage or ask forgiveness from a fellow candidate.”
Of the candidates, all of the women chose to contrite, while all the men chose to gift their rivals.
Interestingly, both Sen. Elizabeth Warren and Sen. Amy Klobuchar both apologized for getting angry during the debates, while the men chose to give gifts instead (a copy of their books in the case of Andrew Yang and Pete Buttigieg).
There has been a lot of criticism, even from the candidates, saying that the women shouldn’t have apologized and that by doing so, they were playing into gender stereotypes. But what does it mean when the president decides to solve disagreements and seek peace by giving gifts rather contriting?
Maybe there is something to look into when Klobuchar said in a CNN interview, “Maybe we need a little humbleness instead of the loudest voice.”
The public backlash against the women asking for forgiveness also illuminates the idea that we see the presidency as a masculine role. Maybe it’s our turn to change our perception of what the presidency means.
We currently have a president who plays up the “alpha male” trope. He’s loud, power hungry, greedy, asserts dominance, disrespectful, refuses to acknowledge any wrong-doing, and is wholly unapologetic. His tactics have led to his impeachment, heightened tensions with Iran, children being forcibly separated from their families and kept in cages, and a continued friendship with Putin. Are these qualities we want in our future president?
There are many stereotypes about women, like how we are nurturing, loving, docile, and gentle. These are stereotypes, but that doesn’t discount the fact that these are all valuable traits to have. We need a leader who is empathetic, embraces differences, and listens, and these traits aren’t mutually exclusive. Our leader should be able to recognize their flaws and ask for forgiveness just as much as they should be a strong and assertive leader.
Maybe we should take a deeper look into what the female candidates meant when they asked for forgiveness rather than advertising their own merchandise.
We need to expand our thinking and adjust our perceptions so that we don’t associate forgiveness as a weakness. It is a necessary trait and perhaps contrition will be the road to the presidency.